she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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