so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
He shit in the fireplace
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
