Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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