And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Found the puke drawer
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
