if i can run in heels then i can drive
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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