ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
