I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
