I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize