he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
