I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
