we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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