I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Randomize
