If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
