hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
