Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
