what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
