just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
