I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
