I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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