Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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