shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
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