I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize