How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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