grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
