Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
