allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
