wrigley field is MILF paradise
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
How does one acquire holy water?
Randomize
