I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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