THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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