Your tits are I can't wait for
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I think people are normalizing furries
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
