Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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