My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
