the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
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