He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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