I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
