She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
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