Who did Billy Mays play for?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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