she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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