you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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