i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
