I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
