My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
