I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
