that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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