I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
