my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
