Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
