Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
