Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
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