Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
